05/01/2026
🔥 FOR SALE: The "Crumb-Snatcher 9000" Artisan Toast Tongs 🔥
Are you tired of playing "Operation" with a metal fork and a live electrical outlet every morning? Do you enjoy the smell of singed fingertips with your sourdough? Stop the madness.
I am offering a pair of limited-edition, bespoke, hand-crafted Toast Tongs that will change your breakfast game forever.
Made from Exotic African Padauk. This wood is naturally a vibrant, "Look-at-me" orange-red. It’s basically the Ferrari of the lumber yard.
Sanded to a "smooth as a buttered bagel" texture and designed to fit any human hand (and some sophisticated raccoons).
$25 each (Hey, Padauk doesn't grow on suburban maples, folks) I have two on hand.