02/09/2026
Sublime Shadowdancer
Some days life becomes argument with existence. Cruelty is in discovering that world is not what we were taught to believe it was.
I was weaving earrings when I found myself thinking about Plato’s cave: people watching shadows upon wall, mistaking them for whole of reality. I naïvely believed that education, experience and willingnes to look carefully would eventually lead me into light.
Light is not simple as we imagine; not absence of darkness but it is having ability to see it. I discovered that world is not necessarily brighter but you simply see more of it. Beauty and cruelty ocupy same landscape. We consume in order to live; destroy in order to create; speak of morality while discovering how painfully expensive it is to insist upon it.
Wisdom is not seeing only light but it is learning to look directly at darkness without allowing it to become whole of what you see.
I discovered that kindness can be crushed beneath indiference; institutions can become enormous stone machines which consume letters, evidence, pleas and human suffering without ever learning names of those they grind beneath them.Doing what is morally right does not guarantee that anyone will stand beside you. I have spent unreasonable amount of time charging at institutions like Don Quixote at windmills: writing, questioning, insisting that people should do what is right simply because it is right. Walls do not even acquire ascratch.
Absurdity of being human is knowing windmill is windmill and charging at it anyway.
I cannot become indifferent.
At my bench Crazy Lace Agate stones seemed appropriate with surfaces that are landscapes of contradiction of delicate lines twisting into one another until certainty becomes impossible. No single line explains stone. Beauty exists in tension between them.
I allowed copper wire to follow rather than conquer stone which resulted in deliberately imperfect, elaborate, and wild, something that grew than something that was assembled.
I am still learning: that holding two truths at once does not mean choosing between them.
World is terribly broken but still beautiful
Making something beautiful is my small refusal to let darkness have